Table settings for the holidays

A request by one of my chicest reader

There’s a definitive art to setting a good holiday table. Too much stuff, it feels busy. Not enough stuff, it feels sparse (scary!). The wrong stuff, the vibes are off and I’m LEAVING!! I’ve lost my appetite anyhow.

In honor of all the hosting we’re all doing this time of year, my recommendations for setting a gorgeous table that will WOW friends and family alike! Step right up!

Setting the Scene

A good table scape starts with a good dining space, so it’s important to be intentional about the space you set. Is it a dedicated dining room that limits distraction? Is it between other rooms that people will need to squeeze through each other to access? Is it attached to the kitchen, and will the kitchen lights be on? What is the seating like? Is it comfortable, or are there ways to make it more comfortable? What is the primary light source? What time of day is it?

Don’t fight these elements - work with them. If your space is tight and lighting is overhead and bright, invite people later on, fill the table with candles, and eschew the overhead lighting entirely. Add some notecards to introduce friends so they’re less likely to get up and mill about.

Widen the aperture when designing a tablescape: how does this exist in the broader space?

You can add cohesion to a set of otherwise mismatched chairs with matching cushions, or ensure dinner is ready and on a low heat in the oven so you don’t have to futz with the big kitchen light or otherwise draw attention away from the table if your dinner takes place right next to the kitchen.

Setting the spotlight on the table to draw the eye away from anything non-essential to the gathering

Symmetry

A good table setting isn’t necessarily symmetrical, per se, but is intention with its symmetry or lack thereof. A deliberately asymmetrical table looks great, as does a deliberately symmetrical setting.

Three matching lamps, color-matched china, and matching chairs. SUMPTUOUS!

And yet…how beautiful is the wild? The untamed?

Balance

Light with shadows, organic with man made, metal and flower, soft and severe. A good table setting balances these elements. Sometimes all you need is a sculptural flower in a soft color to achieve this (level 1). Uplevel your table scape by adding a few similar candles in varying sizes, almost invisible vases, and a full floral in one varietal.

I have been loving a Rembrant-eque table scene. Equal parts sophisticated and devastating.

Colored candlesticks for height, fabric-clad lamps for weight, and deep crimson flowers for volume.

I tend to lean maximal but that doesn’t mean you can’t achieve a striking balance with a pared-down palette and volume.

Don’t forget function

A sculptural or antique pepper grinder, maybe some fun personalized coasters. Your table setting should be 65% function, 35% fashion. Sure, flowers and candles don’t necessarily serve a necessary purpose, but salt shakers, fun glassware, and serving bowls certainly do!

Matching silver from somewhere like Match ensures you have all of your bases covered (olive bowl, candlesticks, water pitcher) while still keeping it cohesive

Layering

When purchasing your dinnerware, I always recommend buying things in a coordinating color palette from different designers. You can layer something ornate and patterned with something timeless and personalized with something funky and handmade. If the colors work together, it will all look cohesive.

All it takes is a thoughtfully selected color palette to take a tablescape from overwhelming to warm and inviting

Or, stick with a theme (antique florals, in this case)

What if you went maximal with seasonal fruit, that way you can re-use your tablecloth and napkins throughout the year and create wildly different feels?

I can spot a Southern tablescape when I see one. When in doubt on mixing and matching patterns, turn towards our friends down south. I promise, they won’t disappoint.

Final Touches

Details like napkin rings and unusual cutlery make a big difference. I’m partial to sleek and timeless or vintage and handmade or funky and unique.

The moment I find these napkins they are mine.

A vintage or vintage-like feel for napkin rings will always remind me of my great-grandparents silver napkin rings we’ve used at my parents house since I was young.